Putting the pieces together: Impact 1/29/10

I’ve been quite critical about TNA since Hulk Hogan came in.  I’ll admit it.  However, this episode of Impact is the first that actually made me think “Huh – this could possibly get better,” instead “Oh god, this is a mess.”  Sure, we still had to suffer through far too much of the Nasty Boys, but the rest of the show wasn’t too bad.  The trick is to forget everything that happened before.  All of it.  Bobby Lashley winning a tournament for the #1 contender spot?  Forget it.  The World Elite?  No thank you.  If you can muster that, you’re good.

The main announcement of the show was an 8-man tournament for the #1 contender spot for the TNA Championship.  Since each spot is won with a qualifying match, it’s actually a 16-man tournament, but I digress.  Two spots were decided when Desmond Wolfe defeated Sean Morley (thank god) and Hernandez defeated Daniels.  We don’t know who the other spots are going to, but we do know that Kurt Angle has a qualifying match coming up – which I suppose means that whole ‘no more title shots in 2010’ was really just a three day thing.

The other main point of the show was clearing up all the lingering questions from Jeff Jarrett, Mick Foley and Kurt Angle.  Jeff Jarrett decided to give up the lawyer thing (that was quick) and try to be a team player.  While Hogan seemed appreciative of Jarrett’s willingness to play ball, Eric Bischoff wasn’t so amused and put Jarrett into a match against Ken Anderson.  Despite Jarrett saying he wasn’t ready to have a match, he just happened to have his gear and put on a decent contest that saw Anderson win after hitting a low blow.  The show ended with Bischoff saying Jarrett had a long to way to go to climb to the top of his mountain.  And now that I’ve typed that out, I’m not sure if I’m comfortable with it.

As for the rest of the show…

  • Despite being fired last week, Hulk Hogan brought out Mick Foley and realizing that he could be an asset, requested that he and Bischoff settle their differences.  Foley revealed that Bischoff had staged the whole attack and let him no in no unclear terms that he wanted no part of Bischoff, even if that meant leaving TNA.  Bischoff persuaded Foley to stay, saying that his actions could also affect Abyss and Jeremy Borash.
  • Desmond Wolfe’s valet is named Chelsea.  Just saying.
  • With a tournament on to decide the #1 contender, Ric Flair and AJ Styles believe that they’ll have a month off and celebrate by making jackasses of themselves in their locker room.  A bunch of strippers models enter the room and AJ Styles gets as giddy as a pre-teen who just realized that boobs are neat.  Bischoff becomes as unamused as the rest of us and lets Styles know that every member of TNA, including the champion, can be booked at any time.
  • Eric Bischoff gave Bobby Lashley his answer by firing him.  And good for him.  Why do you need Bobby Lashley when you have…
  • The Nasty Boys and Team 3D have a verbal sparring match in which they praised themselves and dissed one another.  Riveting television.
  • The Beautiful People defeated Hamada, Awesome Kong and Tara when Madison Rayne hit Hamada with the Ugly Stick.  The highlight of the match was Awesome Kong chasing a screaming Velvet Skye around the ring.  It was really quite funny.  After the match, Angelina Love attacked to remind us how awesome the Beautiful People used to be.
  • Earl Hebner revealed to Hulk Hogan that he called for the bell on Kurt Angle last week because Ric Flair had paid him off.  He also said that he alone was responsible for Montreal, because THAT makes total sense.  Hogan suspends Hebner.
  • Kurt Angle apologized for spitting in Hulk Hogan’s face last week, but reminded Hogan that as long as he’s in charge of TNA, everything that goes down is his responsibility.  As Hogan leaves, Scott Hall and Syxx level Angle and are promptly thrown from the building.
  • The Motor City Machine Guns and Brian Kendrick defeated Amazing Red and Generation Me the Young Bucks in an awesome match.  Kendrick tagged himself in and stole the victory over Red, which didn’t amuse the Guns.
  • After the match, the British Invasion came down and Doug Williams demanded Rob Terry’s Feast or Fired case, which he used to defeat Amazing Red for the X-Division Championship.

Final Thoughts
While not an excellent episode, this show was a lot better than what’s come before and it’s almost starting to look like TNA has a bit of direction.  I actually found myself enjoying parts of it, especially the six-man tag match and Hernandez vs. Daniels.  Of course, we’re still dealing with the disappearance of half the TNA roster.  Still no Samoa Joe and we’re also missing Beer Money, Matt Morgan, half the X-Division, Rhino, etc.

  • It seems that they realized how much fans hated Bubba the Love Sponge and they’ve transitioned him into a normal human rather than a cocky douche who reeks of Rob Bartlett.
  • Hogan seems to have a nasty habit of starting to talk just as his music plays to end a segment.  He had to talk over his music twice.
  • Speaking of music, Brian Kendrick may have the worst music ever in TNA.  Worse than the old Motor City Machine Guns theme.
  • The name of the tournament – The Eight Card Stud Tournament – is awful.  I do like the graphics for it, though.
  • I suppose Jeff Jarrett is back in TNA, then.  Let’s hope he sticks around this time.
  • Mr. Anderson is great at what he does, but I really feel like the whole act is getting kind of stale.
  • I swore that I would stop watching TNA completely if Sean Morley had defeated Desmond Wolfe.  It gave me a glimmer of hope to see Wolfe move on.
  • The thought that Earl Hebner was the only reason for Montreal – vindicating Vince McMahon, Shawn Michaels and Bret Hart – is ludicrous.  I can’t believe someone actually thought it was a good idea to have him say that.
  • AJ Styles really came off as a punk kid in his segments, and certainly not the champion of the company.
  • Is that it for Bobby Lashley?  What a huge waste.
  • The Nasty Boys segment really dragged.  Yes, Sags, we know that you are nasty.  It’s written on your coat.
  • I could watch the Beautiful People’s entrance all day long.
  • We get Hall and Syxx, but no Nash?  Is this Band thing going to go somewhere?
  • I love that Doug Williams took the X-Division title.  While Amazing Red is a great talent, he lacks mic skills, and it’s hard to build a championship feud with a champion like that.  Williams will do good things with the belt.
  • And don’t feel bad for Big Rob Terry.  He defeated Eric Young for the Global Championship on Wednesday during a house show in England.  That actually worked with Young’s stipulations for the belt.  How about that?

There’s also word floating around that Impact will be moving to Mondays in March, but I’ll write on that later.

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One Response to Putting the pieces together: Impact 1/29/10

  1. Pingback: Send in the clowns: TNA Destination X 2010 « The 1/8th Nelson

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