The War of the Rings: TNA Impact 4/26/10

Last week saw a change for TNA as Rob Van Dam defeated AJ Styles for the TNA championship.  So, of course, the show opened with Hulk Hogan bragging about it, bringing out Rob Van Dam then AJ Styles and Ric Flair.  Many ‘high’ references were made (because RVD smokes a lot of pot, get it?) and AJ demanded a rematch rather than the tag match he was forced into.  It was not in the cards, though, as there were bigger things at stake than RVD’s pathetic little TNA World Championship.  That’s right – both Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan’s (WWE) Hall of Fame rings were on the line when Abyss took on Ric Flair in the main event!

After numerous segments of Flair rambling and Abyss admitting that Hogan’s ring gave confidence rather than magical powers (biggest letdown EVER), the match got underway.  There was eye pokes, old men being flung from the top rope, a referee bump, and all the other classic Flair match bits you’ve come to know, love, get tired of, miss, then love again.  At the end, with the ref down, Flair nailed Abyss with brass knuckles in the face and ‘lower region’, woke the ref and got the win.  Finally, Team Flair gets a victory over Team Hogan.

No, just kidding.

When Flair had his hand raised, the knuckles fell to the mat and the outraged ref restarted the match.  A boot and Black Hole Slam later, and Flair had shown that he truly belongs amongst his followers…with his shoulders on the mat.  Hulk Hogan, of course, came out to close the show, removing Flair’s (WWE) ring and the two good guys stood triumphant, as only Hulk Hogan can on the final segment of an episode of Impact (no one else is allowed to).

As for the rest of the show…

  • Madison Rayne defended her Knockouts Championship against both Tara and Angelina Love.  After Love gets pinned by Rayne, Tara attacked her, cried and said that she’s sorry, then attacked again.
  • Shannon Moore lost his third X-Division title shot, this time to champion Kazarian.  After the match, Matt Morgan attacked Moore for dissing him last week (and being ugly).
  • Douglas Williams still has the actual belt and will appear next week to give his opinion on being stripped of it (it pretty much sucks).
  • After the match, Samoa Joe came out and demolished Kazarian for no apparent reason.
  • AJ Styles and Sting defeated Jeff Jarrett and Jeff Hardy in a falls count anywhere match when Jarrett followed Sting to the rafters and got clocked with his bat.  Whoops.
  • Jesse Neal agrees to join Matt Morgan against his partners in crime, Team 3D, after Morgan reminds Neal that he told a dying soldier that he would become a champion.  Seriously.  Team 3D gave their blessing.
  • Before their tag match, Team 3D took a moment to put Syxx through a table.  During the tag match, the Band Wolfpac came out to avenge their friend.
  • Follow me here.  Jesse Neal went to assist Team 3D against the Wolfpac, but Matt Morgan (who kept his belts by DQ) dragged Neal back to the ring and attacked him.  Neal called Matt Morgan back to the ring and brawled with him.  Morgan was then attacked by Shannon Moore as well as Neal.
  • D’Angelo Dinero, complete with eye patch and sling, called out AJ Styles but got Mr. Anderson who out of the blue challenged him to a match at Sacrifice.
  • Eric Bischoff reveals his touted ranking system to determine the next TNA Championship contender.  Fans can go vote on  Yip.
  • Orlando Jordan, all gussied up, got really weird about Big Rob Terry.
  • Kevin Nash teased that the Wolfpac might be bringing in someone else next week.

Looking back
This episode in itself wasn’t bad, especially not by TNA standards.  That means that to complain about the show, I would have to point out gaps in logic that TNA makes on a weekly basis.  Does WWE make logic gaps in their writing?  Sure – but it’s far worse in TNA.  For example:

  1. To run a successful wrestling feud (i.e.: get the fans into it) you need to at least try to make it believable that either side could possibly win.  The main feud of the company – Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair – has been all Hulk Hogan since day one.  Why would you think that Ric Flair could possibly have beaten Abyss?  Ric Flair loses.  That’s what he does now.
  2. TNA’s two most popular stars on the roster – Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam – are defined by their drug usage.  Jeff Hardy has a pending court case over drugs.  So what does TNA do?  Bring it to the forefront of their WORLD CHAMPION by having both RVD and AJ Styles talk about it.
  3. When you have someone turn babyface/heel, usually you’ll want to come up with at least some kind of explanation for it.  Sting still hasn’t revealed why he turned on Hulk Hogan, and by this point I don’t think they ever are going to.  Now Samoa Joe, one week removed from fighting on Team Hogan, demolishes heavy face Kazarian.
  4. And let me just mention Sting and the rafters.  It seems that Sting lives in the rafters of the Impact Zone, because not only does he hang out up there, but he left the match on this show and headed for them with Jeff Jarrett in pursuit.  Originally, Sting was in the rafters because he was against the nWo and he had been betrayed by the fans and WCW roster.  He was in the rafters as a neutral entity, looking down on the battlefield until it came time to join in the fights.  Eventually, the rafters thing stopped as Sting reintegrated himself into WCW.  What is the point of having him in the rafters now?  Is there any point to Sting whatsoever anymore?

So yeah, if you ignore that, perfectly fine episode of Impact.

  • Can Madison Rayne really complain about being booked in a triple threat match when she won her belt in a tag team match from pinning the partner of the champion who herself won it by picking it out of a box?
  • I’m looking forward to hearing Douglas Williams talk about being stripped of the X-Division title.  I would hope that we get a Williams/Kazarian feud.  As long as they don’t give it to Samoa Joe in a squash match and have him go back to holding it forever with no reason as the rest of the division flounders.
  • That’s totally what they’re going to do, by the way.
  • Of the entire TNA roster who could have teamed with Matt Morgan against Team 3D, the only one that didn’t make sense was Jesse Neal.  And there you go.
  • Another soldier tribute, huh?  When does Jesse Neal debut his Warrior Medal?
  • I’m assuming they are teaming Shannon Moore and Jesse Neal specifically because they both have mohawks.
  • Dinero vs. Anderson?  Where did that come from?
  • If that’s all the ‘ranking system’ is, that’s a huge letdown.  I’ll have more on that later in the week.
  • Orlando Jordan reminds me of 1995 Goldust…except not entertaining whatsoever.
  • Another member of the Band?  If it’s Buff Bagwell, I’m going to vomit.

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