My TNA tryout Part 1

Sure, I know I lambast TNA with every awful episode of Impact that airs.  But I’m not completely against the company!  After all, I do watch the show each and every week!  In fact, I’ve got the show down so well, I feel like I can be a strong addition to the writing/booking staff.  To prove my worth, I’ll be submitting TNA tryout angles/storylines – sure to be worthy of the high bar set.

The Setup
Four Knockouts – we’ll say Angelina Love, Madison Rayne, Mickie James and Sarita – all take a few weeks off.  We have Taz and Mike Tenay drop the line that all four are on maternity leave and are coincidentally expecting all at the same time.  To throw off the nay-sayers, we’ll just have Taz joke that they really weren’t showing.  Anyway, all four of them come back at the same time with their babies, and begin arguing over who’s is the cutest.  We get some awkward moments of TNA talents (Jesse Neal, Eric Young, James Storm) being asked which is the best, until finally they four begin brawling in defense of their children!  Because that’s what women do, right?

The Payoff
At the PPV, we have the first ever Baby in a Corner Match in which there are four cribs in the ring – one in each corner.  The idea is that one Knockout has to put their baby into their particular crib for ten seconds while no one else has their baby in one.  We can’t use real babies, so we’ll have dolls instead.  Tenay and Taz will act like they’re real, so no one will notice.  The finish will come when Eric Young, dressed in drag, comes down to the ring with his own baby and crib and places them in the middle of the ring while the four are brawling outside of the ring.  Hilarious!

The Aftermath
We finish the match with more brawling, but on the next Impact, we reveal that all four were impregnated by Ric Flair.  They go to him for child support, be he has a clause in his contract that says should he get any of the female talent pregnant, he only has to support the earliest one.  Then we get a hilarious set of bits where the Knockouts argue over who got knocked up first (revealing that they all slept with Flair numerous times) and even bring in other people who have gotten a ride on “Space Mountain”.  On the following PPV, we get a Custody Agreement on a Pole Match with the winner getting Naitch’s support for their kid.  This, again, is won by Eric Young, who then starts acting like a little kid Ric Flair.

So how about it, TNA?

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